Tag Archives: #iamatwinflame

Trouble in Paradise


I suppose it’s a good thing that I was busy with other things the past few days other than just lurking on the Twin Flame group pages.  Imagine my shock when I checked in and found out all sorts of drama going on — accusations of other twins being implanted with negative entities, this or that person taking sides, and all that bullshit. Other people making videos just to let other know where they stand.

So the person they were hailing as the Ambassador for the Divine Masculines has been — sort of quarantined — for ridiculous hypothetical accusations.  I’m not joining in a fray that’s purely ego driven. I think that part of the responsibilities of being a light worker is to be the clearest channel possible for Spirit’s messages to come through and that means taking off the shroud of ego in service and in life.

So, no, it’s not dark energies that’s been invading them.  That’s a cop-out.  It’s ego, plain and simple.  The thing is they’ve become instant celebrities — at least, in the Twin Flame niche — and they don’t know how to handle it.  Most of these twins have been very low profile in real life and here is “celebrity” all of a sudden, people looking to them for guidance and advice, and your basic preening about how they are with the “in crowd”. Now, if you haven’t been immersed in that kind of dynamic in 3D, it can get in your head and ego, and what results is an overrated power play amongst them, a virtual Animal Farm, so to speak.

Personally, I don’t have a problem in that kind of dynamic because I’ve always been in “that crowd”. So I know that it’s not a big enough deal to get all Game of Thrones for.

Anyway, I got my reading back from Starsoul Tarot, and my question was what else I had to do or my twin has to do in order to get into union.  Three things stood out: 1) that there was some sadness that I had to release regarding a place/memory/song that held much sentimental value for me because of my twin;  2) there was nothing else I needed to do because I did my homework and am now in mission; and 3) I need to have faith and believe in my twin because the long term relationship, the ring and the commitment were coming.

Well, as regards the first, last night I came from an alumni homecoming celebration of my school which was held at that hotel where I hold the most memories of my twin. I was actually hesitant to see that hotel again because I didn’t know how I’d react, but when I was there, it surprised me to find out that the place no longer held any sway for me. I looked at the lobby where we first met; I looked at the seats where we talked; I remembered each time he kissed me goodbye as I headed off to my car, and I thought to myself, “It is done.  It is complete.”  I’ve healed from that place. And the last time I was in that hotel, I was with my twin.

The second one, I’m just ecstatic about.  Okay, so everything I do from here on out when it comes to mission and energy work is just a bonus. There’s nothing else I have to do but be ready to receive.

The third point, on the other hand, is something I’ve already heard before along similar lines. Everything and more.  Better than I’ve ever imagined.  All the pain and hardships that I’ve gone through will melt away and seem insignificant compared to what’s coming. Or that I can have the whole shebang if I choose it.

Now, my dreams about the life me and my twin will live is already pretty much up there. So when she told me that it would be better than I’ve ever imagined — well, you can guess that I can’t grasp it because if it’s better than what I’ve imagined, I seriously do not know how much better. I simply can’t imagine it. So there, I won’t even try.

Surprise me.



Random Thoughts


Can’t think of a better title because I don’t know how this entry will turn out.  I just wanted to write, to connect with something, someone, somewhere out there. So bear with me. Or skip this all together. 🙂 You have been warned.


On the Twin Flame Community Drama – well, that’s winding down. I suppose folks got appalled that a lot were coming out of the woodwork with similar experiences with IamAngelics.Net and they thought that the negativity would shatter the zen, so to speak.  They even “disbanded” that wrongly spelled group (which I am thankful for because the wrong spelling was grating) and created a new one.

My thoughts on this?  Light cannot exist without dark. I don’t think it’s fair to dismiss another twin’s experience if only because it destroys the “hugbox” experience for you.  What we resist, persists.  Not looking at it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.  And, corollarily, just like what they preach in the TF community, just because one hasn’t come into physical union yet, doesn’t mean that one won’t.  It’s part of the Christos Energy, the Alpha and Omega, both ends of the spectrum, embraced.  And I just honestly think that some twins are just looking for guidance (hey, this journey didn’t come with a manual!) and is why they are bringing it up.


#iamatwinflame  — so I joined the new group and am still feeling my way through.  I am really looking for forum for discussion about this journey, but if it only evolves into a “hugbox” full of positivity memes, then at least I’ll know that it is that.

Honestly, I don’t even know if I rightfully belong there.  What if M isn’t really my twin? What if I’m not a twin? I am a confirmed Starseed Indigo Lightworker, that much I know, but the twin part, I was merely guided to it.  And yes, if you backread my blog, you’ll see me recounting all those times when I asked Spirit if I was a twin flame and his/her answer, but still, you know? In any case, if it’s something like “gender” in the 3D, then I am identifying as a twin flame haha. My inchoate book title just got a bit longer — “The Little Lost Starseed and Reluctant Twin Flame” 🙂

I figured, I’ll find out the real answer to that either when I come into union with my twin in this lifetime OR when my time is up on this Earth.  In any case, if I have been mistakenly sending unconditional love to my false twin, that unconditional love has to have been sent somewhere and it would also do nothing but good. I might have wasted my time denouncing other experiences with someone else in this physical incarnation (status as of now, but I may get bored a couple of years later being alone and celibate and just hook up with someone else who doesn’t mind not being the love of my life — just keeping it real), but it was still my choice.


Houston, We Have a Problem – I googled my TF this afternoon.  That was after one of my coworkers introduced me to a deep web search and I got curious what would turn up for him.  Well, nothing on that engine, so I went back to good old Google.  Still, nothing that I hadn’t seen before except for the fact that he had plumbing work done on his house back in 2014. (The site listed remodelling permits).

I even texted him today only because some of the readings said that the Divine Feminine was wearing a mask and to tell him what you truly feel and to reach out and not be afraid to be rejected.  As usual, no response.

So, for all intents and purposes, he might as well have fallen off the planet.  So what do I make of this soul yearning that I have for him?  My soul knows he is my twin as certain as I know that there is a God or that the sun will rise in the East tomorrow. I know I sound like I’m contradicting myself given what I’ve written above, but just look at it as the sound of one hand clapping.


Nervousness. — I am nervous what will happen in my 3D life in the days to come.  My mom’s birthday party is coming up and that might mean another ambush in public by my family which I can’t evade really because it’s going to be held at our house which I don’t really know if it will be my soon-former-residence.  I’m just taking my “courage shot” from the thought that Spirit will have my back, however this turns out.  Pure trust because I have nothing else to rely on.  I just hope my prayers are heard.

On the other hand, I just found out (by accident, again because my mom mistakenly messaged my sister in a group chat with my sister’s other friends) — that my sister has a criminal case.  She’s a nurse in Halifax.  I’m guessing something along the lines of Criminal Negligence, but the fact that my sister wouldn’t give details of it even to my mom makes me think it might be something more.

What is even more worrisome is that she told my mom that she’ll tell them the entire story “when they come to Canada” which is implying that it could be very soon, which, of course, will fuck up my balance again. And it’s times like these that I wished I could have just not volunteered  for this mission.


Reiki Attunements — On the other hand, I am seriously looking forward to being attuned in Usui Reiki, Ascension Reiki and Reiju Reiki! I think it will be another avenue to use and share my divine gifts. I really do want to help other people and pets heal and do life coaching.  I’ve already been healing others when I can but it is an unstructured sort of pranic healing with the Divine Rays and the Healing Codes. With that, you have to direct the energy.  Anyway, I’m pretty excited about that.

So that’s the report for tonight, folks.  Hope I have better news in the next few days. Namaste.




Drama in the Twin Flame Community


There’s been a bit of commotion in the Twin Flame community the past couple of days. But because I’ve made myself the self-appointed scribe to jot this down for those who might have missed it or who seem confused, let me lead you through what happened.

First, there was a movement spurred by Shamama Hunting Owl encouraging Twin Flames to come out with the hashtag #iamatwinflame and to keep it on their FBs for at least 24 hours.

Second, various reactions to this from various personalities on YouTube.  The latest of this was Scott & Cici’s pronouncement (TwinFlameUnion1111) in their video where they said there were “Wolves in Sheep’s Clothing”.  Well, much more was said, but the gist of it was that since YouTube doesn’t regulate who can come out in videos, there are those who claim and pose as Twin Flame teachers who may not even be necessarily twins, and who may not be acting for your highest good.  Use your own intuition and discernment in figuring out who these people are.

Thirda lot of feathers got ruffled and Mystic Moon Woman came out with her response through this video: Twin Flame Weekly Reading/ plus some of my thoughts on a certain show. 🙂 In a nutshell, she was raging mad at the pronouncement of Scott & Cici, claimed that there were many dark energies in YouTube (presumably, this is the category she was lumping Scott & Cici in), and then proceeded to exalt the benefits of finding like-minded people on Facebook who were going through the same journey.

Fourth, although not directly related to the tiff above but on a tangent, I found this video from Brandie Nichole sharing her experience with IamAngelics.net. It didn’t contain glowing reviews, let me tell you that, but more on that later.


I’ve exercised self-restraint in joining the fray although I’ve joined that FB community “Consiousness1111” which was sort of difficult to find because — gerddamit, it was spelled wrong! It may just be the grammar nazi in me, but if someone doesn’t take due care in looking up the spelling of something before creating a group/movement, there are some credibility issues there, right?

Anyway, I joined, just the same, and after reading stuff, I still didn’t join in on the conversation. The bandwagon is tricky thing and I feel that some folks are touting on the twin flame badge as an ego extension, which it shouldn’t be. You cannot effectively do your work as a twin via hashtag. Sure, it gives you companions on your journey, but most of the soul lessons you learn on this journey, you learn in solitude because you have no one else to rely on other than Your Higher Self (a.k.a. the God in us).

And I do agree with Scott & Cici that you have to use your own discernment when it comes to Twin Flame teachers and those who claim to be twins.  I’ve called out a twin flame teacher or two on YouTube especially when I felt that they were misguided for the moment.  Even with IamAngelics.net, I got a red flag.  That video I found calling her out just confirmed my hunch.

What happened with me was that I sent her an email after a video in which she was faltering about the TF journey.  It was supportive and I thought it would help.  Instead, in her next video, instead of being grateful for the support, she ranted about how “essays were draining her energy”.  And I thought to myself, what an ungrateful fuck! But I let it go because I didn’t want to simmer in that negative energy.

Anyway, I don’t even know why these two camps are dishing it out.  Personally, I didn’t even subscribe to Scott & Cici’s channel because I didn’t like the format of how they delivered their teachings, but that’s just me.  And while I find Mystic Moon Woman’s readings very good, those that have jumped on the bandwagon with her, not so much.  Maybe they’ll get better with time; I don’t know. At this point, it’s always when the student is ready, the teacher will appear and there’s always the cautionary tale of the blind leading the blind.  One just needs to sift through the crap.  That’s when discernment and the Higher Self comes in.