It’s finally done. I passed all the requirements needed for a possible appointment in the judiciary. I’m still feeling ambivalent about it – especially in the light of reports that first timers never get appointed, and of course, by the fact that if ever I do get either of the posts I applied for, that my life will do a 180 degree turnaround just when I’m just getting used to it. But what the hey, if I don’t pass what is required, that option will never be available to me. So there it is, I threw in my bet for a game of russian roulette.
If I reference all the readings regarding me and my twin with this point in my life, yes, I was supposed to be going through this toxic time of putting things together on the fly, but it was supposed to be for my wedding with my twin, not my career.
It’s been sort of the same with all the other forecasts and events — slightly off tangent. All those things that happened, I was supposed to be doing with the physical embodiment of my twin, but I ended up doing it alone. They all still came to pass, but not with my twin. So I have a theory on that.
The stuff that’s prophesied for me and my twin, they’re still bound to happen, but both of us have to be ready for it. If my twin’s not ready yet, it still happens to me, but since he isn’t around yet, I get to go at it by my lonesome. If the point was to show me that I could do it sans my twin, then okay, point taken. I would have done it anyway for lack of choice, right? Then again, I’m getting tired of this argument because no one from above seems to hear me or recognize it, that the point I’d want to get to is to enjoy life with the physical embodiment of my twin because that’s one thing I don’t know how to do at this point in my life. I’ve been going solo for most of it.
Anyway, during this brief period of chaos and confusion when I was getting my requirements together in order to meet that fricking deadline, I was hoping to get some guidance through my dreams. And yes, my dreams have been prolific, except for the fact that I can barely remember them once I get my groove on with my gargantuan list of things to do.
The significant points that I remember though, I told myself, I would write about. So here goes.
Yesterday, I had a dream sequence that was action packed. It was very Inception-like because I knew I was dreaming something that I had dreamt before in my dream. (Yes, confusing, I know) It was like a remake of a tv show, and what I remember was that the show was entitled “Event Horizon”. That’s what was repeated several times over in my dream so that’s what I ended up remembering. I wished I remembered more because it’s important.
In the middle of rushing last night for today’s deadline, I googled. Apparently, it’s a scientific term. This is what I got:
“[A]n event horizon is a boundary in spacetime beyond which events cannot affect an outside observer; a point of no return.”
A point of no return? WTF did I just get myself into again? And, better yet, what was this pertaining to? My love life? My career? My soul path? What invisible boundary did I cross this time?
Sometimes I just wish that these messages came with a footnote for peace of mind.
Then, there was this morning’s dream. I was supposed to wake up early since I realized that there were a couple more things I had to get done in the office to complete my requirements. I slept early, at around 10pm, and did wake up at around 6am, but was mid-dream, plus my body needed more rest so I ended up waking up late. I felt there was a message in my dream, but all I remember was that I was being shown these shoes that I was wearing. They looked like pearls at first, but upon focusing and zooming in on them, I realized they were shoes that were glowing with a pearlescent white light. I didn’t recognize they were shoes at first because the light was glowing so bright.
This is what I got about shoes:
“A dream about shoes may symbolize how you are moving forward on your career path or spiritual path in life.”
This one, too:
“Shoes in general suggest the situation you are in or a position in life. They can also indicate your character or chosen way of life through what type of shoe – a plain shoe, a fancy expensive shoe, an impractical and painful shoe.”
So, considering that I was shown to be wearing shoes glowing with a bright light, does that mean I’m enlightened? If I would put the most positive spin on it in my 3D life, it would mean that whatever path I choose to take, wherever my feet would take me, I would be guided by the light. Of course, that doesn’t say anything about love or if my dreams of tangible wealth would manifest, both of which are foremost in my mind.
I also wish that those glowing shoes were a sign that my “Labors of Hercules” are over. Something like a diploma or a graduation present. Kind of like Dorothy’s Red Ruby Shoes that will “take her home” if you click on it thrice. So, have I slayed the Wicked Witch of the West? I hope so. I am very tired.
Some twin flame videos say that the only time we will get into union with our twin is if we fully practice our mission. One even said that the first wavers will come into physical union this August-October. And that the second wavers are slated for 2019.
Re practicing my mission – I have no idea what to do with my spiritual gifts. I use them when I can, but I’m not sure if spirit is telling me to offer services in this regard. I feel I need to meditate deeply for answers on this.
The last time, I had already fulfilled my earthly mission which was to educate my earthly family. I’ve done that. Graduated from it already as I’ve recounted in my previous posts. The last “mission order” I got was to have a family of my own and be happy. Unless that’s changed, of course. I don’t know.
Re physical union – I’ve sort of surrendered this. Divine timing, they said. And, from my readings, it looks like my twin is still emoting about his failed marriage, and it will take some time for him to realize that we are meant to get together to do more for the planet. It’s almost futile to ask at this point.
Re my career – tbh, it’s really just something I’m doing to survive while waiting for my twin and to survive, of course.
I feel that time is running out. And 2019? Wow. I have no words for that. Can’t even bear to contemplate going through whatever I will have to go through to get there only to learn the lesson “See? You were able to get through it on your own! Yay!” Mercy, I beg of the heavens. If all this striving in solitary is all that is planned for me, Mercy and Compassion, please.
And hells, yeah, now, I’m publicly crying in a cafe as I’m typing this out. Got to stop. Bye for now.